5 Tips for Online Dating

June 13th, 2007

5 TIPS for Internet Dating - For Better Matches and More Fun with Online Dating

Meeting others through online dating clubs has revolutionized how people connect with each other. Think about it - 2 generations ago women and men usually met because they lived in the same town or general area. As more women attended universities, both men and women had a wider pool of potential partners.

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With internet dating - there are no limits. You can meeting people from anywhere and everywhere. You can find dating sites that are just for your religion, or your activities, or your age group. Using these resources wisely can lead to great dating experiences and new friends - to marriage or life partnerships.

Using the tips below will help maximize your chances of finding a great partner or dating experience. They are common sense - but are commonly forgotten, too.

1. Know yourself

If course you know your likes and dislikes - but do you know your attitudes? Are you the same person when you are with the opposite sex or do you try too hard to please? Are you impatient or demanding? Men and women both will show the best facets of their personality when meeting someone new. That’s fine, but don’t become a chameleon to try to fit with the other person. It won’t work.

2. Honesty

You have the opportunity to fill out questionnaires about yourself and what you want in a potential date. Be honest about it. Don’t try to pretend to be what you’re not - or you can’t meet people who will truly be a match for you. If you say you are 6′2″ - and you are really 5′10″….someone is going to notice that. If you don’t like sports, say so, don’t waffle around about it. The little white lies you tell in this area can become big problems if the relationship becomes serious.

3. Purpose

Why are you looking for dates? Simple question but important. You may just want to go out more often or want to meet new friends. Maybe you want a series of relationships, nothing too clingy. Perhaps long term commitment is the goal. You may want to try it all - and that’s great, too.

4. Find the Positives

When you meet a new person, look for three positives! A nice smile, good eye contact, a quick laugh. It is easy to find something wrong because people seldom match the image in our minds. Finding a few positives before looking further starts a new meeting off right.

5. Communication Participation

Keep your conversation light and easy when you first meeting a new dating partner. This is the time to tell about the funny shopping experience or the rafting trip over the weekend. Three topics to avoid during this period are: the “kind of person” you are, your ex-wife, how many children you want. You just met a new person - don’t try to tell your life story in the first two hours you spend with him/her. Another topic best avoided on a first date is surprising: jokes. They may be funny and fine if told as A joke but trading jokes one after the other is a smoke screen and keeps you from getting to know each other.

Dating and Relationships - Are you Safe?

May 15th, 2007

Have you ever wondered…just before leaving to meet someone new….

Am I safe?

Is this guy normal?

Could he be playing me and not be at all what he seems? If you do, you probably shrug and laugh at yourself and your vague fears.

You may be cautious (that’s smart) and tell your family or roommate where you’re going to be and when you expect to be home. You may even ask them to call you in an hour or two as an added precaution.

Those are great ideas…but if the man you are meeting is a predator those precautions won’t save you. Predators come in all shapes and sizes; the short, sweet dumpy guy or the 6′1″ hunk may be kind, funny and perfect for you….or scam you, stalk you, even hurt you.

Internet dating changed the landscape for women. No longer are you meeting someone who knows your aunt or co-worker or is the friend of a friend. Joining an online dating membership gives you the chance to meet men from anywhere anytime. You can read about who they are, where they’ve been, what they do for a living. They may have listed their favorite type of food, where they like to travel, what their hobbies are…

…and, if you’re lucky, they may be telling the truth.

Learn to tell the bad guys from the keepers, click here

Online Dating

May 11th, 2007

Dating has never been easier. Meeting online is now accepted as a great way meet new people and a chance to find the love of your life…or at least a dinner date for the weekend.

Do you feel you are safe with the man you met online? Do you feel you know him? After all, you’ve shared your thoughts by email, your profiles match well, and you talked to him on the phone.

With each contact you feel you are getting to know this new person, but has it occurred to you that he may be saying only what you want to hear? What’s his background? Has he ever been accused of stalking? Is he mentally stable? Does he have a quick temper and an ego easily bruised?

Is he really a nice guy? How do you know?

Dating services provide a perfect avenue for dangerous men to meet new partners. The man may not intend to hurt anyone yet may have obsessive tendencies, may become violent if rejected. Reports of stalking, abuse and threats related to dating partners has increased in recent years. Is it due to more women reporting the problems? Or is it due to the much wider group of potential dating partners to choose from?

An important book just released handles this serious subject with logic and efficiency…a highly readable book, concise and comprehensive. Sandra Brown provides women with essential information on how to protect themselves against heartache and abuse. In defense of the opposite sex, she does point out that there are good men out there, you just have to watch out for the bad ones.

For more info on this experienced therapist’s experience,    click here

Women Choose Dangerous Men

May 11th, 2007

In 1988, Sandra Brown founded a counseling center where eighty, mostly female victims, came through the doors each week. After years of counseling individuals and groups, Brown realized that many of her clients had a chronic problem: They chose pathologically dangerous men as romantic partners. This made it difficult for her clients to heal from earlier traumatic experiences. Brown saw that issues of partner selection had to be included in clients’ recovery, or they would never go on to develop healthy relationships.

The counseling center began treating (mostly male) perpetrators, as well, and Brown witnessed an unwanted side effect: Male perpetrators and female victims were meeting in the lobby—and HOOKING UP! To avoid fostering these relationships, the clinic began seeing male and female clients on alternative days. But Brown herself was hooked, too—on coming to grips with a core issue:

Why would victimized women be attracted to perpetrators in the first place?

She found this relational dynamic disturbing.

Out of sheer frustration, Brown asked her female clients, “What do you need to know to stop picking pathological men?” A client responded, “I don’t even how what ‘pathological’ means. Is that something I need to know about? If it is, teach me!” From that day forward, a form of Psychopathology 101 was taught to all female clients to help them learn to recognize, avoid, and ultimately leave dangerous men .

.An expert therapist is giving women a weapon to protect themselves.. click here